


someday, i'll bloom into you. [an atsuhina story]

by katzuhina



Category: Haikyuu!!, やがて君になる | Yagate Kimi ni Naru | Bloom Into You (Manga)
Genre: AtsuHina, M/M, Pain, kagehina but like kageyama gets rejected haha, literally inspired, very bloom into you ish, very slow pacing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:33:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27750838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katzuhina/pseuds/katzuhina
Summary: what is love?is it an emotion? is it a very odd, maybe even useless feeling? or could it be a way of expressing yourself?perhaps we’re defining love in all the wrong ways, or maybe there isn’t even a decent way of interpreting love. not that it would really matter to him, but even if it did .. even for a little bit. then maybe hinata would have been able to define love in the right way.it’s not that hinata's a complete stranger to love, even if he hadn’t experienced it himself, he had always liked reading about it, listening to drama cds and even watching 'romantic’ animes did the job for him.as the story progresses, hinata learns about love through the hard way. perhaps atsumu miya, his upperclassman from inarizaki high, could change his path.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	someday, i'll bloom into you. [an atsuhina story]

**Author's Note:**

> o hno o . .. chapter 1/2 ....

what is love? 

is it an emotion? is it a very odd, or maybe even useless feeling? or could it be a way of expressing yourself?

perhaps we’re defining love in all the wrong ways, maybe there isn’t even a decent way of interpreting love. it's different in everyone's eyes, but not in mine. not that it really matters to me, after all, love is love. but even if it did matter tp me .. even for a little bit. then maybe i would have been able to define love in the right way.

i know that there’s a difference between loving and hating, liking and loving, and disliking and hatred. yet, despite there being a huge difference, they’re all used in the same way. making them more similar than we’re forced to believe.

it’s not that i’m a complete stranger to the forms of love, even if i hadn’t experienced them myself, i had always liked reading about it, listening to drama cds and even watching 'romantic’ animes entertained me enough.

these forms of love are supposed to make your heart flutter and beat fast, your eyes sparkle, and your palms sweat. i guess it’s like having a huge interest or hobby, but instead of your longing for that one interest, you’re longing for another human. whether it’s your childhood best friend that you had known since you were five. or a pretty celebrity that’s way out of your league that you had seen in newspapers, or social medias..

there’s the love that you’d die for, the one you’d spend an eternity with, and the one that’d mess you up worse than you would’ve expected..

it’s not that i’m afraid of loving.

\- after all, i do know how to love. i ‘love’ playing volleyball with kageyama and the rest of karasuno: it makes my heart flutter, my eyes start to sparkle and my entire body shivers when i get to play in another tournament or match. i also really love meeting new competitive rivals, i absolutely love the little giant. and i love the feeling of growth after practicing on the same thing for months, like my receiving.

what i'm afraid of is that my way of experiencing love is a lot more different than what they say in the media.

my love isn’t meant to be interpreted as anything romantic. and i can’t seem to love anyone that way either. i know a confession wouldn’t sweep my feet off of the ground. and i know it wouldn’t give me the same giant wings, and amazing feeling as hitting the opponent's ball does. 

i just don’t think i’m suited for anything that involves romance. i’m fine without it.

09/11/2012. kgyma.  
dear diary, i broke his heart.

‘hey dumbass,’ kageyama roughly tapped hinata on the back of his head, his hands softly going up to ruffle through his orange hair. ‘there’s something i need to tell you. follow me.’ and without further ado, kageyama walked out of the gym, heading to the outdoors. hinata huffed, ‘oi, kageyama! wait up!’ the orange haired boy pouted, quickly hopping after him.

while chasing after kageyama, hinata had noticed the scenery and location around the two boys seemed very familiar. maybe a little too familiar. the sun was coming down, and they were walking down a large, brick staircase. it made hinata vividly remember the day he had met kageyama, as the king of the court. as a selfish, blood yearning king, who didn’t show remorse to his teammates. the kageyama he despised oh so much.

the tall, dark haired boy suddenly stopped walking, causing hinata to bump into him. he groaned, hitting the tall boy in front of him in the back. hinata laughed at kageyama, but there was no response whatsoever. ‘kageyama! what’s wrong?’ 

‘did i hurt you? i’m sorry- i didn’t mean to bump into you, bakaya-’ 

‘i like you.’ kageyama immediately interrupted him, breaking down the silence, only to create an even longer session of them being quiet.

‘what?’ the shorter boy blinked.

...

‘i like you, hinata. i’d like you to go out with me.’ his words seemed direct and instant, they almost seemed a bit desperate. for hinata, it sounded like it came out of nowhere, without any subtle hints. while for kageyama, he had been longing for this moment since they defeated fukurodani in the nationals, together.

hinata waited a while to respond, he was paying attention to how his own heart was acting, how his palms were doing .. and if he could see his color turning red through kageyama’s blue eyes. he wanted to ask kageyama so much, he wanted to know why he loves someone as silly as him. he wanted to know how he’s certain it’s love. but through the noise of the breezing wind, he couldn’t hear anything at all. not even his own mind speaking to him. not that it would have mattered though, as his body’s answer was the exact same as expected.

kageyama’s palms were sweating, and so was his forehead. hinata’s palms were dry. kageyama’s heart was racing, hinata’s wasn’t even skipping a beat. kageyama’s eyes were sparkling, as if there were big shiny pearls in the blue ocean. but hinata’s orange eyes stayed the same.

hinata’s feet were still firmly planted on the ground, he didn’t feel like he could fly, nor did it feel like he was walking on a cloud. ‘i’m sorry, kageyama,’ 

he had expected his own heart to react like this, but he didn’t want to hurt his best friend, his soulmate, the one person he could trust more than anything. ‘i can’t love you,’ hinata gasped for air, every time someone would confess to him, he'd feel like he was drowning. to remain calm, he closed his eyes and started to count to five. just like tanaka's jersey number. just like karasuno before we raised up to the top.

one, two, three, four, five.

one simple ‘forget about it.’ and kageyama ran off with a shattered, black heart. one simple countdown and another soulwould accidentally get crushed by hinata. and that's how another star had lost its light. and that's how out of the 38 lovers, 28 have already dimmed down.

maybe he couldn’t reach the stars after all.


End file.
